Monday, 27 June 2016

What Happened Last Week | June 20th-26th

Hello lovelies,
Last week was a mix of highs and lows if I'm honest with you. I had some amazing days but then other days when I just felt at breaking point. As per usual if you want to know about my week, grab yourself a nice drink, possibly as snack and settle down to the post.

Monday 20th |
After working fathers day weekend I finally had the day off to relax. Now the week before, orange is the new black got released on netflix. I'd watched a few but basically spent my day binge watching the show. My cork board, Polaroid's and draw pins arrived, that meant that I could finally get started on my pretty little cork board. I did a post about that you can read here.

Tuesday 21st |
Back to work on Tuesday and I was in a bit of a strange mood. Not really sure why but after work I just needed to shut off. Life just got to much and everything just got to me. My night ended in a quiet walk home while I felt very guilty, I basically went really quiet on chummy. She hadn't done anything wrong but I just went silent. Sometimes I need to just shut off and on Tuesday that came on very suddenly. Anyway I had a pretty early night after watching an episode of orange is the new black.

Wednesday 22nd | 
I felt a hell of a lot better, I still felt very guilty about the night before so I basically spent my day grovelling to chummy. She honestly wasn't bothered but I just felt cruel. Anyway I went along to my little cousins first sports day, her team won and I cant tell you how proud I was to see her standing there with her little medal. She is such a little ray of sunshine, she made me feel so much happier. Ohhh me and chummy placed an order on the Disney store as it was 50% off some bits. Chummy picked me up at about 21:45 for a drive. Now I wont go into what that was about but it was needed, she needed it and so did I after the events of the evening. It was nice to just go on a long drive, grab some McDonald's and just chat.

Thursday 23rd |
Another late at work but I spent the whole day looking into intensive driving courses. Now we all know that I've been on and off driving for a while. I started looking into that because Wednesday made me realise just how much I want to drive. I want the freedom to be able to just go out somewhere for a while and go for a drive. Work was okay, I just kept to myself really. I just wasn't feeling people and I also had a lot of people saying how of course I would defend my chummy. Of course I will but the fact that we are best friends has nothing to do with it, its the fact that she wasn't there to defend herself and I know the facts from a situation that got taken out of context.

Friday 24th |
Another day off but I couldn't watch any Orange is the new black. Me and chummy agreed we would watch the last two episodes together. Now I looked more into the diving but deiced that I want to start now, I looked into it and I found a female instructor and she's got good prices. I want to do 4 a week if I can from July but I have to see when she has free. I had my first trip to Costco. That sounds like such sad little fact but my dad got a Costco card, its alright like I got 12 ciders for £11. We all know that I like a nice drink so that was good. We were going to go to harvester for dinner but they were all to buy, we ended up getting Chinese instead and I started to watch master chef.

Saturday 25th |
Work was hell. From the moment I got in it was manic. Now everyone left at 2 leaving on a handful of people on a very busy day. Before work I wrote chummy a little note and posted it through her locker, I know that may seem silly but I'd love it if I went into my locker and found a little note. I just thought it was a nice thing to do, it was basically a little apology for being mega b*tch during the week. My evening was spent watching Glastonbury waiting for Adele to perform. 

Sunday 26th |
I had work at 11 and I felt like death. Now someone at work just kept on getting on my nerves, I know I was a stressy b*tch but sometimes people just get to me. I read something on my break that was the sweetest but it just made me realise that I'm not going to have that. Just the simplest thing and for me, it looks like that won't happen. Its fine but I think its time to change the goals now. I'm a little tired of holding out for something that will be my "happy ending". I need to find something else that will give me a "happy ending" now. Now I know if someone read that they'll probably think I don't want to hear about relationships, of course I want to hear. I'm not bitter because other people have them, I'm just realising now that my goals need to be changed because the more I dwell on that being my "happy ever after" the more I'm hurting myself.

Anyway that's what happened last week. Today I think chummy is coming round to watch orange is the new black and maybe a film. I feel really bad, I don't want her to feel forced into coming round so I'm leaving it up to her.

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