Wednesday, 30 March 2016

Im back |

Hello lovelies,
Over the last few days I've been in the worst place. I spent the weekend mostly crying about how stupid I felt and I went into shutdown mode. I vented most of this on twitter and the response from all of you was incredible. I think for a while I've been so worried that my blog wasn't going anywhere, after the last few days I've seen just how much support I have. You are all scattered around the world and you all still managed to make me feel so loved.

I think some people start a blog in hope they make money, mine was started as an escape and a few days ago I felt like I couldn't cope. I shut off from the world and for a while I even ignored messages from my favourite human, I'm sorry for that but she knows that I just needed to shut down. I know my limits and I had got to a point where I just felt like everything was to bad to make good again. We all know the story of what happened Saturday and I was miserable because I thought I had ruined a perfectly good friendship. My friend was adamant that I hadn't and she said that he was fine with it. I wasn't convinced so messaged him yesterday in my break.....I went on my break in the worst mood and came back with the biggest smile on my face, all was good and I felt like I had my friend back. I was just so worried that I'd ruined it, fast forward about 8 hours and we were all in a group chat again and it was like nothing had happened. This is also the group chat I left because I felt awkward, the same chat he then added me back to later. Thank you for being the most understanding human and making me feel like less of an idiot.

Anyway I think all the stress of life had just been getting to me, I let stress get to me and I almost stopped doing something that brings so much happiness into my world. I'm really sorry that I was going to stop my blog for a few weeks, I thought I needed time on my own away from everything but it turns out that I needed you. You reading this now, because of your support in back doing the one thing I love the most.

As bad as I feel that I was going to take that break, I now know that you don't mind if I need to take some time for me and I really appreciate that. This blog is nearly 2 years old and that's quite scary. For two years this has been my everything and I hope that together we can make this something even more special than it is to me know.

I have so many plans for my blog, I want to take this somewhere and actually make a success of something. This isn't just a hobby to me anymore, its a massive part of my life and I want to make it so much better for you all.

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